Witty and funny Food quotations . . . click on the authors’ names for more.

Erma Bombeck :
“Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence.”

“Just think of all those women on the Titanic who said, ‘No, thank you’ to dessert that night. And for what?!”

Gilbert K. Chesterton
“Music with dinner is an insult both to the cook and the violinist.”

Lewis Grizzard :
“If you eat something, but no one else sees you eat it, it has no calories.”

W. C. Fields :
“I cook with wine. Sometimes I even add it to the food.”

“The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.”